don't ever scare me like that again!

     On October 27, 2012, Dustin and Myles were in a horrible ATV accident. Dustin was driving 60mph through a corn field with Myles on the back, they crashed right into a ditch. Myles was catapulted off the back and landed right on his face. He had seizure activity and was air lifted from the scene. Dustin was transported by ambulance to a local hospital and then transported to the same trauma hospital that Myles was air lifted to.
     So 2 of my 3 children were in this awful accident. Myles broke his jaw on both sides, his orbital floor on both sides, and his left cheek bone. He had surgery on October 29, to wire his jaw shut to allow it to heal. Even though he broke his face, he had no head trauma!, and no internal injuries. Dustin had internal bruising of his liver, pancreas, kidney and lung. They had angels watching over them I am convinced.
     I plan to put them in bubbles now, because I seriously might die if they scare me like that again! I am so very thankful that they are gonna be OK. Myles has the inconvenience of eating his food through a straw for 6 weeks, but he's gonna be just fine. No scars, no lost teeth, no head injury, no visible damage. God is so good. We are so blessed.
    

Please...drive me crazy

OK, so about my crazy week!

Last weekend, on Friday, Myles decided to swallow a quarter. Yep, you read that right a quarter! He swallowed it. I went into how he IS almost 10 years old and how many times have I told him not to put things in his mouth since he was little, but he had of course, already swallowed the quarter. Well, on Saturday, Myles is throwing up most of the day, dinner that we had before he had swallowed the quarter, so I get nervous about it being stuck and take him to the emergency room. They took an x-ray, the quarter was in his stomach and they said to bring him back in 2 to 3 days for another x-ray to see where it is at. So, I keep asking him if he has pooped it out. Like three times, he tells me he thinks he did. Well, it was only one quarter and he does not know if he pooped it out, and he couldn't have pooped it out three times!!. I'm tired of asking him if he's pooped out the quarter by then.

Tuesday, their father calls me at work, says that Dustin is in the nurses office at school, he's itching, maybe from the chlorine at the pool since he has started swimming again. But he's in the nurses office itching and wants someone to come get him. He says he is going to leave work to go get him. In the mean time, the ER radiology calls me to say that it looked like the quarter was lodged and want Myles to come back for another x-ray. I call the ex, tell him, since he is going to go pick up Dustin from school. Could he take Myles for the x-ray?

He sends his wife to go get Dustin, cause God forbid that he actually have to do anything for his kid, like go pick him up from school. And he did not want me to go get him on his day. Well, anyway, they don't get Dustin the Aquaphor for his itching like I said to get him that used to be prescribed for him for dry skin, but give him an oatmeal bath instead. No one takes Myles for the x-ray like the radiology department says, because apparently their father has now got a PhD that I was unaware of and the x-ray people must be wrong! I'm stressed out because they are with him and he is not doing what I would be doing with the kids and of course I have no control over that because they are with him that day. I hate that I have no control over what goes on with them when they are with him.

But, OK, so last week, Dustin did not get the best teacher conference...he has anger issues and well...an attitude and a half with most everyone when you are telling him what to do. And then the school counselor called about the same issues as the teacher, so I make him an appointment with his counselor (that he has gotten to take a break for the summer providing that he has no "issues" but apparently he has issues or there would not have been a not so good conference and call from the counselor), and when I tell him over the phone that we are going there, he HANGS UP THE PHONE ON ME!!! Yep, you read that right too. Hung the phone up on me and would NOT get back on the phone when I called back mad as hell. I was so mad, I was seeing spots. I knew that he would not want to go there, but to be so utterly disrespectful to hang up on me. OMG!! I was livid!! I was actually glad that I had to drive about an hour before I actually got there to pick him up.

I am stressed out. I mean I am doing the best that I can. I have two jobs. I am going to school full time. I have three kids. I am involved with the kids. I care about what they do, like I am supposed to. I am working my ass off and getting no where fast. I'm just so sick of it. Sometimes, I really feel like I could just walk away. I don't want to be me. I don't like being me. I hate my life. I hate the fact that I hate my life. I want my kids to listen to me. I am tired of dealing with everything.

And yet...

I know that I can not just walk away. I do not want to. They are my kids. But damn, it just really sucks right now. Everything.
Until next time and thanks for reading this long post.
Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated...

I'm going to need a glass of wine!

My kids are driving me crazy.
As I sit here and type this, Dustin is fighting with Myles, Luke is crying because they are fighting. I have said stop about a hundred times now with no response. I have even went in to break it up three times. I am never going to get through this weekend.
I am going to need a padded room for myself before the weekend is over!!
Seriously.

Family friends and so much more

When I started attending my church in 2001, we instantly became good friends with this family, the C's. They truly are a blessing. They are great people with big hearts. So, it only was natural that when Luke was born that they become his Godparents at his baby dedication. They love that kid so much, well, they love all my kids. And I have watched Heather and Ashlee grow into the best young women that I am so proud to love. These photos were taken when Ashlee graduated High School. It is so hard to grasp that they are all grown up now. No more are the days when they are calling wanting to spend the night at my house. No more are the days that they are coming over just to hang out. They are all grown up with busy lives of their own. Heather even has a serious boyfriend!

Luke seriously loves them so much. They are extended family to him and all of us.
Ashlee has became such a responsible smart young woman, it's hard not to see her as the sweet little girl that she was when I first met her.
Heather just started her 3rd year away from home at college. I am so proud of her, even though I miss her terribly. She is doing good.
This is Ashlee with all my kids. We love them and really they love us back just as much.

**Note, I could not find good photos of Mary and Alan, their parents, but we love them too. :)

Summer is officially over!

OK, I was all ready for school to start, yes. And now I am rushing around like a crazy woman (not that I wasn't already a crazy woman!) after school, eye doctor, store, dinner, baseball practice, and then we did not even get home until 8:15pm and Luke is already supposed to be in bed by then and Myles is supposed to be in bed by then too! Dustin takes an hour shower, which I still can not figure out. I mean, really...He takes longer showers than I do. He's a boy. Hour showers?? Hmmm.

Ahhhh, School starts...

My boys go back to school tomorrow. I'm glad. They have fought most of the summer and when they were not fighting, they were complaining about one thing or another. They just need to get back into the routine of school, homework and activities. I will be doing more running around chauffering kids, but that's how it goes. I'm sure that most moms are happy, although a little sad to see the kids go back to school. I can't believe that the summer went by so fast. It's the middle of August already! Next thing I know it will be Christmas. I'm so not ready for that yet.

My oldest

I don't know where I'm going with this one. While scanning the old photos, my oldest son looks back smiling in almost every photo. Happy even. That's a rare sighting these days. He is so darn crabby. He's not happy about anything. It's driving me crazy. I can't believe this is my kid. He is constantly complaining about EVERYTHING. I swear everything. I try to do things for him that I know he will like or want, and he still manages to complain or find something wrong with it. This past weekend, he found a car model that was put up until he was older. Well, he wanted to put it together, so he needed glue and paints, so I drove into town to go to Walmart for what he wanted. I was only going for his things, and I had to go by the mailbox to drop some bills and he was huffing and complaining...This does not look like Walmart to me! I couldn't believe it! I drove all the way up there for him, and he's crabbing that I had to go by the mailbox! What the heck is wrong with him?? I really hope that this is just a phase he is going through. I mean, he is 12 almost 13. I realize that this age is difficult, but jeez, give me a break.

I just can't believe that this is my kid! Please whoever took my smiling first born, please return his former self.

Missing happy smiles, please return!

When does school start?

My kids are driving me crazy!! I can not wait for school to start! I don't think the summer is ever going to end. My oldest who is 12 totally does not listen to me. He acts like I don't even say anything. He has a 'whatever' attitude about everything and it is about to make me flip out! My middle son who is 9 fights constantly with the 4 year old and I can't stand it. Every single word out of his mouth is in complete contradiction to what his brother is saying and it does not matter what it is. The youngest could say that the sky is blue and #2 would say 'no it isn't!' They are slowly making me lose my mind. And the youngest, well, he imitates everything that his brothers do, and needless to say, they are not teaching him good things with attitudes like this. I always feel bad for yelling at them all the time and then I sit back and think to myself, well, if they were listening to me I wouldn't be yelling at them! I really try to be patient with them and it never fails that they start fighting and ignoring me and I end up getting really mad and yelling. Granted, I do not start off yelling, this comes after about 20 times saying the same thing or listening to bickering for 30 minutes, that I want to pull every hair out of my head! Seriously. School can not start soon enough.