Monday, May 3, 2010

I have so much on my mind, I feel like my head could literally explode. I have little energy for anything. I know it is this depression. I can not get into see Dr. Shrink until the 26th. I know that I am needing a medication adjustment, I just don't know what. I really would like to start jogging, but, that leaves me with the problem of who is going to watch Luke while I do that? I need to do something. And this point, I do not have enough to pay my bills for this month. I have to call my landlord and tell him tomorrow. I am hoping that he will be a little understanding and work with me. If not, then, I don't know what I am going to do. It just really stinks that I am 35 and struggling with money all the time. I have a degree in accounting, but have yet to find that accounting position. I filled out an application last week that I had hopes about, but have not heard anything from them. I intend to call tomorrow to check up on the application.
I am helping y friend out this weekend at a "Going Green Expo" at the fair grounds. Then Sunday for Mother's Day, our family ALWAYS goes to my sister's house for a get together. We have done it for the last 11 years now. I have to bring cheesecakes. That is her only request of me every year. So, I oblige. And lately, I have been craving being with my family. I don't know if it is triggered by how many people I have lost in the last six months or just something going on with me. But it doesn't hurt to want to be with them.
In other news, the giant puppy has taken a liking to chewing up shoes. She gave up electrical cords after being jolted, but she is loving shoes. Two pairs of my work shoes, Two pairs of Ashlee's flip flops when she was up here, and recently, Myles' brand new Nike's. Needless to say, I am less than happy about it and have yet to find a way to deter her from this. (Hitting her with the shoe in anger the other day did not help.) So, if anyone has any ideas or advice, please, do tell. And she does have plenty of chew toys and rawhide bones and harder bones, she's spoiled rotten, and still she chews the shoes! Then, I look at her and remember how badly I needed her when I got her. Mentally, I was a mess. But, I would like her to give up the shoe fetish.
And, Diana, I will be thinking about you this Mother's Day. I know how badly you will be missing your Mom. Love to you. And Vickie, your words mean so much.
Happy Mother's Day.


Diana said...

Hi Bonny,
Thank you so much for thinking of me and I think that it's a great thing to be with your family on Sunday. It sounds like a good idea and it sounds like you could use it!
I wish I could suggest something to help with your bills. I have been there, many times. We are still struggling but other than doctor bills, at least we aren't behind and that helps.
But you know even though we are caught up, I still worry about tomorrow, next week and next year. Who knows what could happen, good or bad? But it just never seems to help, so I try really, really hard not to let the bills dwell in my mind. And I know that sometimes you just can't help it.
So all that I can really offer is a prayer for you. And I will do that.
As far as the dog goes, you said he has plenty of chew toys so I would hide the shoes and maybe try and take him for more walks or runs. Sounds like he may have some pent up energy! I have a Pug who doesn't chew shoes but you better not leave any slippers laying around!
Love Di ♥
P.S. I wish you a wonderful Mother's Day Bonny, have fun O.K.?

Bonny said...

Thanks Di!